CONSIDER YOUR RELATIONSHIPS

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 DAY 3 - January 7

I read a quote the other day that said, “Relationships are like a walk in the park.  Jurassic Park.”  And I couldn’t help but chuckle in agreement.  It is in relationships that we will have the time of our lives, one moment, and fight the urge to run for our lives the next!  Not because our lives are in any real danger, but because relationships involve people.  And all people, present company very much included, are messy and flawed.  And when I bring my flaws and mesh them with your flaws in a relationship… hello Jurassic Park, and my cue to isolate and go into “protect ME” mode.  

This scenario doesn’t just relate to toxic relationships.  It is our default to scurry into our shell like a scared turtle at the first sign of possible pain, even when dealing with those we love most!  This is one of the key reasons marriage is so difficult - because a strong and lasting marriage requires you to fight that urge to run and stick close to “fight it out”.  But there are those relationships in your life where it is wise to create some separation.  A little bit of “flight” rather than “fight” isn’t always a bad thing.  The key is telling the difference!

Go ahead and grab your Bible and turn to Ezra chapter 4.  Let’s start by reading verses 1-4.  

If you don’t look at this passage closely, it could appear that God’s people are being exclusive, only allowing “their” people to be a part of the rebuilding process.  After all, the request made in verse 2, “Let us build with you…”, was met with a clear and concise rejection in verse 3, “...You have nothing to do with us building a house to our God…”.  Why was there such a strong and negative response to this request to help?  Let’s take a quick look back at verses 1 & 2, which say,

“Now when the adversaries of Judah and Benjamin heard that the returned exiles were building a temple to the Lord…they approached Zerubbabel…”

What appeared at face value to be the offering of a helping hand was really a stealthy attempt to hinder and delay progress in rebuilding the temple.  However, Zerubbabel and the other leaders recognised these people for what they were - liars and deceivers.  So, even though they could have definitely used the extra hands in building, they kept this group at arm's length, using wisdom to protect the Lord’s mission and call to rebuild the temple.  Jesus warns us of this very thing in Matthew 10:16-17:

“I am sending you out like sheep among wolves.  Therefore be as shrewd as snakes and as innocent as doves.  Be on your guard; you will be handed over to the local councils and be flogged in the synagogues.” (NIV)

Despite the clear determination to not allow a deceiver into the ranks as a builder alongside them, the great deceiver (satan) still slithered his way into the minds of God’s people by the way of fear through the words of others.  Remember what verse 4 said?  

“Then the people of the land discouraged the people of Judah and madethem afraid to build…”

Ezra 4:4 (ESV)

Notice, scripture doesn’t give any indication of any kind of big, catastrophic event having happened between verses 3 and 4.  No major event that would incite fear, especially not to the degree that would halt progress on rebuilding the temple.  So what happened?  “The people of the land discouraged the people of Judah…”  In other words, the voices around them, the voices they allowed into their hearts and minds, brought them to a place of fear and ultimately led them to abandon their God-ordained mission to rebuild the temple.  

If you were to read on in Ezra 4, you would read that this deceptive group, the “adversaries of Judah and Benjamin,” as verse 1 puts it, didn’t stop at mere chatter.  No, they went all in on their mission to derail the rebuilding of God’s temple and wrote a letter of accusation against the Jews to King Artaxerxes, the king of Persia, stating that the Jews were “rebuilding that rebellious and wicked city…finishing the walls and repairing the foundations…” and “if the city is rebuilt…they will not pay tribute, custom, or toll, and the royal revenue will be impaired.” (Ezra 4:12-13 ESV)

Well, that threat of loss of money and power definitely did NOT sit well with King Artaxerxes, and he, unsurprisingly, ordered an immediate halt to the rebuilding of the temple.  And this wasn’t just a short hiatus while they worked out all the details and reached a clear understanding before moving forward.  No, this was a hard stop that lasted until “...the second year of the reign of Darius, king of Persia” (Ezra 4:24).  A span of approximately 20 years!

Yep.  You read that right.  For 20 YEARS, progress on rebuilding the temple of God had come to a standstill.  For 20 YEARS, no one lifted a finger in accomplishing what God had called them to do.  A 20-year delay occurred simply because the people of God allowed the words of those around them to trump the words of God spoken to them, inciting fear that kept them from fulfilling all that the Lord desired to do in and through them.  

Have you ever been there?  I know I have.  I can look back over the years and see moments when the Lord spoke to me clearly about what He wanted me to do, but I allowed “outside voices” to distract and detour me.  Sometimes it was my own thoughts, sometimes it was the thoughts and opinions of others.  Sometimes it was fear or insecurity.  But no matter the form, the voice that distracted me was always, without fail, a voice other than the Lord's!

The Jews in Haggai were in a similar situation.  Verse 2 says, “...these people say the time has not yet come to rebuild the house of the Lord.”  Nothing in that verse points to what God had to say on the matter.  Instead, they were operating within their own ideas and plans.  There is no denying it - the voices we allow into our lives and the relationships we embrace have an effect on our actions and our obedience to the Lord’s leading in our lives.  

So does that mean that we shouldn’t ask for the advice and wisdom of others?  Absolutely not!  There are many people in my life whom I go to regularly for advice, wisdom, and an outside perspective.  The key is ensuring that you allow the RIGHT voices to speak into your life.  

We see the power of this truth in Ezra 5:1-2:

“Now the prophets, Haggai and Zechariah the son of Iddo, prophesied to the Jews who were in Judah and Jerusalem, in the name of the God of Israel who was over them.  Then Zerubbabel the son of Shealtiel and Jeshua the son of Jozadak arose and began to rebuild the house of God that is in Jerusalem, and the prophets of God were with them, supporting them.”  (ESV)

I want you to pause for a moment and let the weight of what you just read sink in.  A 20-year pause in God’s purpose ended almost as abruptly as it began, and the only real shift was the voice the Jews were listening to!  Where the voice of the enemy incited fear in Ezra 4, the voice of the Lord brought to them through the prophets Haggai and Zechariah reignited confidence in the Lord and a unity among His people as they began purposeful work together once again.  The “adversaries” didn’t go anywhere.  The “threat” was still there.  God’s people were simply reminded that they had no reason to fear, for He was still with them.  

Today, I challenge you to evaluate the voices (aka the relationships) you have allowed in your life by asking yourself these questions:

1. Do those closest to me speak words of life and Godly wisdom?  

2. Do the actions of those in my inner circle compel me to stay on mission for God, or do they distract me from His purpose and calling?  

3. Are there any relationships I need to distance myself from?

4. Are there any relationships that I need to grow and cultivate?

5. Who are the “Haggai and Zechariah’s” in my life?  (Those who spur me on in the Lord’s calling and purpose.)

6. Who in my life can I serve as a “Haggai and Zechariah” to?  (Spurring them on in the Lord’s calling and purpose for their lives.)

   
   

Finally, I again challenge you not only to commit the verse below to memory, but also to revisit and reflect on it regularly. Let this verse guide you and motivate you to pause and consider your ways in the weeks, months, and years ahead - staying persistent and proactive in seeking alignment with His purpose.

​“Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me.” Psalm 51:10 (KJV)